Sometimes I have to wonder if people have a clue.
Driving home from taking my girl pixie to school today, I saw the postings on neighborhood traffic sign poles.
LOST KITTY!! GREY. TINY SIZE. IF FOUND CALL....
LOST DOG! (written above a black and white Xeroxed picture of a fuzzy little Lhasa Apso pup)...
Honeys, this is Colorado. Didn't you know when you were buying that "tiny size" kitty that you were really buying fox food? Didn't you know that your little Lhasa pup was really just expensive coyote kibble?
Do you not know that when you post those signs for your lost teacup pet thinking that maybe Cuddles the cat is just visiting a neighbor, you're embedding false hope into that five year old of yours? Maybe Popcorn the puppy is just camping out for a few nights? Really? Do you really want to lead your kids on that way?
Yeah. I'll help you find your pet.
Oh, Junior! A nice lady named Melissa called! She said she found your tiny baby grey kitty! She said we'd find him out on Baptist Road in the entrails of that poor red fox roadkill!
Ha! Ha! Ha! I grew up in the Conifer/Evergreen area - right smack in the mountains, surrounded by beautiful herds of bugling elk and visions of baby bears playing in the forest. I never had a cat that lived longer than 5 years because they would mysteriously disappear. Now I'm paying the price. I got two long-haired cats about 9 years ago, not having a clue that cats *CAN* live a LONG LONG LONG LONG time. They're driving me nuts! They're already twice as old as any cats I had when I was younger. Don't they realize that they're past their prime? Why are they still here, tormenting me with their long white hair and presents of hairballs all over the carpets? Why me? Why didn't someone tell me that cats usually live a long time?
ReplyDeleteOh my, Melissa. What has become of my caring, empathetic friend?
ReplyDeletei'm sorry, do i know you?
ReplyDelete;-)